Sirius Black and the Faulty Love Potion
by ughdoihaveto
Summary: 'This is by far the greatest idea he's ever had, he thinks as he hands his best friend the 'special' pumpkin juice. James downs it in one, smiling gratefully – obliviously – and Sirius waits eagerly for the potion to take affect.' A short one-shot in which Sirius (by no fault of his own) discovers his best mate's feelings for a certain redhead.


**Just a little one-shot I wrote on the bus. Enjoy!**

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This is by far the greatest idea he's ever had, he thinks as he hands his best friend the 'special' pumpkin juice. James downs it in one, smiling gratefully – obliviously – and Sirius waits eagerly for the potion to take affect.

He waits ten minutes, chatting casually with Peter but keeping his eye on James the whole time. He wants to see the moment it hits him. Except James looks the same as ever. Maybe Sirius just has to wait until Evans actually comes down for breakfast.

She finally does – ever the late-riser – yawning and running a hand through her tousled red hair as she laughs with Dorcas Meadowes. James shoots her a small smile and looks away again, turning to talk to Remus about the Transfiguration essay they have due today.

Sirius doesn't understand. James is acting no different, and he'd definitely seen Evans. Why isn't he serenading her, throwing roses at her feet? Maybe the potion just hasn't kicked it yet.

He decides to wait, watching his friend intently.

They finish their breakfast and head off to McGonagall's classroom, Peter making truly atrocious puns the entire way while Sirius and James groan and Remus throws his head back in laughter.

McGonagall has them all practising animate-to-inanimate transfiguration, and to Sirius's delight, Evans seems to be having a hard time of it. McGonagall, bless her, orders the class' top student over to help the struggling redhead, and James saunters over to Lily's desk.

Sirius watches out of the corner of his eye as James patiently demonstrates the correct wand motion to a visibly flustered Evans.

The potion still hasn't kicked in, it seems, as once Evans gets the hang of it, James high-fives her (something she's clearly reluctant about but relents anyway) and returns to his desk.

Sirius is now highly suspicious. He'd bought the potion from a reputable shop in Diagon Alley and _surely_ it would have taken effect by now. It's been an entire hour.

He considers asking Remus's opinion as they visit the loo before History of Magic, but he can already imagine his friend's reaction; he'd say it was immoral and cruel and he'd give that speech again about how all love potions should be banned.

So Sirius keeps his mouth shut. Maybe he'll ask Peter in Muggle Studies. Surely Peter will see the funny side to this.

Peter most certainly does _not_ see the funny side of this. It's almost as if he's channelling Remus as he chastises Sirius. Sirius apologises (they both know he doesn't mean it) and explains that the potion hasn't even worked. No harm done, except to his wallet, of course.

Peter scowls, promises not to tell James or Remus. Sirius is glad – he can handle Peter being peeved off (he'll be all chummy again once he gets a sandwich), but Remus is the most stubborn person he knows – aside from himself, of course. He'd surely tell James, and then where would they be?

Sirius has been in the doghouse far more frequently than he'd like, and wants to avoid it if at all possible. But he trusts Peter won't mention it.

Lunch is uneventful. James doesn't even look at Evans, though she does send him the occasional glance. That is until he stands up and struts over to her and Marlene McKinnon – he probably wants to discus this evening's quidditch practice with the blonde – and Sirius watches in amazement as his friend all but ignores Evans until smiling goodbye at the two girls.

Sirius is beginning to get annoyed. He'd spent seven sickles on this bloody potion and the damned thing isn't _working_. He takes a deep breath to calm down before excusing himself from the table. He takes his bag with him to the loo and once inside, fishes the potion bottle from the bottom of his satchel before returning to the Great Hall, the potion up his sleeve.

Once seated, he surreptitiously slips another dash of the stuff into James's goblet and watches his friend sip from it. Now that the dose has been upped, it has to kick it. Right? Sirius beadily watches James, waiting impatiently.

He waits and he waits and suddenly it's dinner time and he's still waiting.

James acts no different. He doesn't blush whenever Evans looks at him (which is often), he doesn't gush about her beauty (and she is looking especially pretty today, even if she's not quite Sirius's type). He doesn't even look at her any more than usual.

Sirius sneaks another look at the potion bottle in the dorm. It said twenty-four hours. Maybe it meant twenty-four hours until it takes hold?

No, it doesn't. The label is very clear: 'Potion will take effect within 30 minutes of ingestion (best before consumption of food) and will last exactly 24 hours. Guaranteed results.'

Guaranteed results, Sirius's arse. James is acting the exact same as always. The only way he wouldn't be swooning over the obnoxious redhead is if he was already in – oh.

OH.

Sirius snickers to himself and places the bottle carefully in the bottom of his trunk. He trots down to the common room and takes his usual spot among the boys, giving James a friendly pat on the back as Peter asks if anyone wants to play Gobstones.

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 **Thanks for reading! Reviews are always appreciated :)**


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